I am sitting on a cold bench.

To be home, to be home! It doesn’t feel the same as it has before. My trip up and down the West coast was delightful. Bits of my notes and writing might best communicate my heart over the last nine days:

Day 1: January 25, 2010: Train to Seattle

The sun is rising to reveal the machines of factories and fog that mystifies the trees. In the distance, blue sky peaks through the clouds, but it has seen my heart and turns it’s face away.

But now the sun has hit my eyes and lights up my dancing fingers. I am sitting on a train and contemplating the obviousness of life. There are times when the water reflects car number nine but before my face appears, it is gone. Life is fleeting, I guess.

My hair is dark again: we colored it natural. I don’t really know where I am going with this. Except for that man will be where he desires to be. There are more songs about trains then about other things. Also, I don’t know if you’ve noticed but the sky goes on forever.

Outside the window, the river is gone and trash makes up the view. Piles beside a concrete edifice, blowing smoke into the air. The sun remains and shoots off the window of a car, it blinds the man who sits beside me.

Directly in front of me, a man asks his companion for his Bible. I noticed that he seemed a sweeter man. People converse across the car and I remember a favorite song. But to “Stop This Train” would mean missing out on what is coming, Oh goodness, how cliché. Manicured to overgrown, this city keeps surprise in its pocket, a favorite badge.

I have a family of 250 people. It makes me cry to think about Love. Sometimes I consider giving it all away. But I am looking at a rainbow on the far side of a swamp and I realize that God has promised to be faithful. As I wrote that line, it disappeared: I think it was meant especially for me.

Faces on trains are reflected back in a window, while the sky fades blue to shades of grey. Beneath the land is desolate, which contrasts nicely and reminds me of the modern photo shoot. I wish I could find a theme to this writing.

My heart is breaking for the person I am not. I haven’t met her, but she makes up most of my acquaintance. When I think of her it makes me cry and wonder what makes me different.

I should use “Tunnel” as a verb.

More Day 1: January 25, 2010: Brittany Time.

5: Gwinn for dinner

After: Tea Cup :] back by 7:45!!

8: Bible talk on “pizza building.”

Amelie—watch :]

Scrabble

Friendship Island!

Day 2: January 26, 2010: Admissions appointment.

This is lame. I think this guy is literally twice my size.

“As a transfer student, what kind of classes can I expect to transfer over?”

“Tell my about your communications department. Newspaper, radio?”

Media internship.

“Study abroad.”

Uuuuugggggghhh.

Day 3: January 27, 2010: Bellingham.

…I never thought to be concerned for the salvation of John Mayer…

Day 4: January 28, 2010: Bellingham.

My fingers hurt.

“I want to be like Paul or John the Baptist or whomever else – accepting of the plans you have for them – NO MATTER what they were.”

Day 5: January 29, 2009: Airport Day.

“P.S. Just straddle and squeeze all the air out.” Packing strategies.

Band Names Are Hard To Come Up With (But Easy To Find)

-Corporate Salsa

-Aquatic Hitchhikers.

There is a woman across the aisle staring at us. Her child is adorable. Ah well, I am being a bit loud.

Day 8: February 1, 2010: Everyone Is In Class: Biola University.

Sarah, you feel good here. Biola has community that you haven’t experienced anywhere else. People seem to really love Jesus – they seem serious. My fear (one of) in coming here is that I will forget to stoke my own heart for the Lord and become too focused on the support and fellowship of other people. It is so, so important that my heart and mind are focused on God’s plan for me…

Scholarships, scholarships!

(See FEB.1 post for more.)

Home: February 3, 2010: 12:15 pm

I am sitting on a cold bench underneath the bright, grey Oregon sky. Having been three hours ago just outside LA, the two-hour nap I took on the plane felt like a portal into another world.

Received: 11:19:07 am Today

Guitar guy from yesterday played in chapel today. Soo good!

Received: 12:21:27 pm Today

I wish you were here.. Hannah is sad, Ari is mad at me for failing to tell her that you were leaving.. she wanted to say bye!

Received: 3:33:20 pm Today

Are you home yet?

Received: 3:56:51 pm Today

I’m good :] how were your schools?! Did you decide?!

It was a good trip.