When strivings cease.

Emily Rion and I were conversing over fancy coffee when the subject of image and Christianity came up. It was decided that none of us really know who we are. That was when I realized that I have all of these dreams of who I want to "become" and they are all completely artificial! Yes, good conversation is something to be valued, but only if it is edifying to the soul and not to one's self image! Fortune and fame are tools to spread the gospel, but they are not ends in themselves.

Why am I trying to be anything other than a woman of God?
What is it to be successful? What is it to be worthy; interesting; different?
Why do I listen to anything other than the voice of He who sustains the earth, who created me from dust and breathed life into my nostrils?

Definition is arbitrary if I find it in any other or by any other than He.
Galations 6:2 (Keep it in context).

Maybe if I told you the right words at the right time, you'd be mine.

I am on a Tracy Chapman kick. Tonight I went to the dollar theater with Joel and Mel to see the newest Chronicles of Narnia movie:

“Please, Aslan,” said Lucy. “Before we go, will you tell us when we can come back to Narnia again? Please. And oh, do, do, do make it soon.”
“Dearest,” said Aslan very gently, “you and your brother will never come back to Narnia.”
“Oh, Aslan!!” said Edmund and Lucy both together in despairing voices.
“You are too old, children,” said Aslan, “and you must begin to come close to your own world now.”
“It isn't Narnia, you know,” sobbed Lucy. “It's you. We shan't meet you there. And how can we live, never meeting you?”
“But you shall meet me, dear one,” said Aslan.
“Are are you there too, Sir?” said Edmund.
“I am,” said Aslan. “But there I have another name. You must learn to know me by that name. This was the very reason why you were brought to Narnia, that by knowing me here for a little, you may know me better there.”


Didn't God bless Lewis with the most amazing mind? Listening to Aslan made me desire God. It is so wonderful to be the daughter of a God that comforts however necessary. Tonight, as I pondered the literary genius that depicts the Father as a powerful and safe lion, I was comforted. Literature is comfort to me and the Lord chooses to use that.


Do I make sense? Oh well, it's in my chest - not my mouth - anyway.

I feel myself on the edge of something.

"Bob Pierce once said,

'Don't fail to do something just because you can't do everything.' These are wise words to anyone overwhelmed with the magnitude of human suffering in our world. We are not asked to help all of them at once, just one at a time."

-The Hole in Our Gospel, Richard Stearns

I needed to read these words and Stearns was gracious to include them. I have yet to sit down to read this book without tearing up. I pray that the Lord will never let me forget what my heart is feeling right now.

I Corinthians 1:3

Grace
She takes the blame
She covers the shame
Removes the stain
It could be her name

Grace
It's a name for a girl
It's also a thought that changed the world
And when she walks on the street
You can hear the strings
Grace finds goodness in everything

Grace, she's got the walk
Not on a ramp or on chalk
She's got the time to talk
She travels outside of karma
She travels outside of karma
When she goes to work
You can hear her strings
Grace finds beauty in everything

Grace, she carries a world on her hips
No champagne flute for her lips
No twirls or skips between her fingertips
She carries a pearl in perfect condition

What once was hurt
What once was friction
What left a mark
No longer stings
Because grace makes beauty
Out of ugly things

Grace makes beauty out of ugly things


-U2

I've seen people try to change

and I know it isn't easy, but nothing worth the time ever is.

I've only 20 minutes until class.

The reading is finished in time for American Lit. I am not sure it counts if it is within the last thirty minutes before the deadline - especially during the first week of school. I think this is going to be an interesting semester.

I have an interview this afternoon at 2:30. The Apologetics Office finally sent me an email late last night in response to my resume and I am grateful for my first (and hopefully my last?) interview of the semester. I will work. I will work. I will work. I should have brought my interview dress to LA.

I will also get involved in a ministry. I will no longer subscribe to this "all-talk" business. Maybe I will even have a radio show. I should probably figure my life out.

I am currently wearing my new(er) high rise jeans and a cropped shirt that Nana/Kathy gave me last year. I would be willing to bet that this sweater-shirt is older than I am. I just ordered iced tea without any flavoring or sweetener. In conclusion, I am a grandma.

Stay tuned for a excerpt from John Winthrop's "A Model of Christian Charity" circa 1630.